Have you ever been stocked with sex-related questions from a child? until you read through these 8 steps you will continue changing the topic and shying away whenever your child asks you about sex-related questions.
Well, discussing sex with kids does not have to be scary, you will even get more out of your own talk depending on how calm you are. Most times children tend to feel uninterested in anything that has to do with sex.
It is either they are scared of asking you the question or that they don’t actually know how to structure the question.
Children actually need guidance and help to understand puberty stages, pregnancy, risk of unprotected sex, intimate relationships, etc.
It is your duty as an adult to provide adequate information to them, this will help them become responsible adults.
These 8 steps will guide you through educating your kids the right way about sex
Some parents actually think that it is too early to start teaching or educating their kids about their bodies. Educate your kids that some parts of their bodies are private, that those areas are private, and such it shouldn’t be played with by anyone especially by the opposite sex.
This should be done by answering their question using words they understand, for instance, if a 3-year-old child asks you where babies come from, you can say MOMMY’S TUMMY and leave it at that unless they ask an additional question that needs further explanation, trust me if you answer these early questions simply and directly, the kids will always confide in you for other sex-related questions.
DON’T FORGET TO USE PROPER TERMS:
Hehehe, don’t go changing the names of some body parts, teach them the proper body parts like vagina, breast, penis, scrotum. vulva. The fact is that these children are way too smart, they might purposely ask you that to know what your response will be, using cutesy terms for the genitals will just portray that there is something different and shameful about those parts to them, so please while trying to talk to them about their private parts, ensure you are using the actual names to those body parts, these will make them believe that it is always ok to discuss all body part, especially with you.
It is still okay to use slang terms occasionally, for instance, if you have little boys, you might not be able to avoid the word “Balls”.
NEVER YOU DODGE QUESTIONS ABOUT SEX
If you are the type that always pretends that you did not hear the question or tries to change the subject you, should stop that immediately because the children will simply see it that sex is some sort of taboo subject to discuss with the parent, no matter how uncomfortable you are, you are actually the right person to address your children question about sex and relationships.
It is a different thing to admit that you don’t know the answer to the question, and offer to help them find the answer than to shy away from the question.
ALWAYS STAY CALM:
If you feel that you gonna be tenses up whenever the question comes up, always take a few breaths and steady your mind. Always listen and try to react when your children ask you question relating to sex, the more calm you are, the more relaxed they are around you.
TELL THEM THE FACT:
As children, all they need is the right information about puberty, sex, birth control, pregnancy, etc. Make out time to gather some facts about these questions, kids of this generation actually start their puberty earlier than the previous generations, so, don’t feed them with the wrong information, let the internet compliment what you have told them about sex.
DISCUSS HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS;
Don’t get too carried away teaching your children about sex and forget to talk about sex as part of a relationship, for christ sake these kids need to know how to prevent unwanted pregnancy and so on, they should be able to differentiate between healthy and unhealthy relationships, so don’t skip relationship while talking about sex, the two works hand in hand.
MAKE USE OF INCLUSIVE LANGUAGES:
Inclusive languages such as sweetheart, romantic interest, crush instead of boyfriend or girlfriend is a nice way to start.
Some words we use sends some kind of signal to our children about our beliefs. Adequate use of inclusive languages/words will help help your children to feel relaxed while asking you questions.
FINALLY, TALK ABOUT GOOD REASON TO HAVE SEX:
it is true that you might not want your children to have sex now or any time soon, but then that should not be the reason to scare them away from sex, always tell them that sex creates a powerful connection between human beings. The mistake we make is that we spend almost all our time educating our children what not to do, how not to get pregnant, in the interest of protecting our children from sex, we often make them forget the fact that this thing called sex is also good when done in the right way, with the right intension. Don’t make them see sex as a taboo.